The Precursor
Okay, I am finally ready to produce my blow for blow account of this wedding! It would be lovely if it could be accompanied by pictures, but lets just say that the USB connection on this PC is questionable to say the least. This post is about what we like to call the engagement. It is actually formally known as the traditional wedding, and takes place 2-3 days prior to the actual wedding. In this house the day before the engagement was complete bedlam/mania. Emotions were running high, tempers were flaring, people were freaking out....and i was longing for the comfort of my bed...and buffy! No such luck. Anyway we somehow made it through all the screaming and shouting and last minute glitches to the morning of the engagement. My cousins Akintayo and Funlola arrived from London to add to what was a house of about 50 people!!! Crazy, 50 make-up bags, 200 lipsticks, 70 eyeliners, hundreds of eyeshadow palettes, 200 pairs of shoes.....I think you're getting the picture. I've been scarred for life. Keji would've passed out had she been here!! Anyway, at the last minute, we finally got hold of our engagement outfits and got dressed. I had to wear a gele for the first time in my life! Hysterical....there is no scanner here so the picture posting will have to wait a while. I was then rushed off my feet because I suddenly found out that I was expected to read a letter of acceptance???!!!!??? Had no idea what the hell that was. I had expected to go with my sister to Ace and chill till later when she was called!
Anyway, after all the rushing and craziness, I left with Grandma and Bibi and we arrived at the venue at about 1.30pm. (Kick-off time was 12pm....Naija time!) The venue was absolutely gorgeous. It was the Army Officers' mess in Marina, so that meant it was by the water. The good thing about this was that as well as having a beautiful backdrop for our engagement we had that lovely seabreeze!
The ceremony was nice. Femi's people came forward with all the gifts they had bought for the wife and presented a whole table of stuff, including a baby goat that we are referring to as Omo Ojo!!! Then they all had to prostrate and beg for Omo's hand, and then they presented their letter of request. I was called up to read this letter ( I had to give them a few funky steps on the way!!) then I went up to read . It was full of arrows so I had to correct them as I went which was rather disconcerting....but never mind! Then we gave them our letter of acceptance, which was much nicer than theirs, it was a beautful scroll of parchment in a pink basket!! Not that I'm complaining, I made a lot of money! After all the ceremony, they brought the bride out, all the cousins danced in with her and that was when the drama began. Earlier on my mum and I had been sprayed with loads of money, and I had left the bag with Aunty Enny when I went to dance in. She got to chatting and ignored it and of course someone came in and stole from the bag. She then acted as though it was my fault grrrr!!!!!! Anyway, the army officers chased this guy all the way to V.I!!!! They brought him back and retrived the money for me!! I was impressed by this, but if course as it is Nige..I had to settle them. Then they whipped the hell out of this guy, bound his hands and feet..and threw him over the fence into the ocean!!! It was crazy! I hope someone fished him out because that was extreme!
All in all, we had a really nice day. Bibi Green even showed up so that was nice. We had loads of fun...I came away thousands of naira richer from all the spraying. What was not to enjoy....just had to brace myself for the wedding!
Anyway, after all the rushing and craziness, I left with Grandma and Bibi and we arrived at the venue at about 1.30pm. (Kick-off time was 12pm....Naija time!) The venue was absolutely gorgeous. It was the Army Officers' mess in Marina, so that meant it was by the water. The good thing about this was that as well as having a beautiful backdrop for our engagement we had that lovely seabreeze!
The ceremony was nice. Femi's people came forward with all the gifts they had bought for the wife and presented a whole table of stuff, including a baby goat that we are referring to as Omo Ojo!!! Then they all had to prostrate and beg for Omo's hand, and then they presented their letter of request. I was called up to read this letter ( I had to give them a few funky steps on the way!!) then I went up to read . It was full of arrows so I had to correct them as I went which was rather disconcerting....but never mind! Then we gave them our letter of acceptance, which was much nicer than theirs, it was a beautful scroll of parchment in a pink basket!! Not that I'm complaining, I made a lot of money! After all the ceremony, they brought the bride out, all the cousins danced in with her and that was when the drama began. Earlier on my mum and I had been sprayed with loads of money, and I had left the bag with Aunty Enny when I went to dance in. She got to chatting and ignored it and of course someone came in and stole from the bag. She then acted as though it was my fault grrrr!!!!!! Anyway, the army officers chased this guy all the way to V.I!!!! They brought him back and retrived the money for me!! I was impressed by this, but if course as it is Nige..I had to settle them. Then they whipped the hell out of this guy, bound his hands and feet..and threw him over the fence into the ocean!!! It was crazy! I hope someone fished him out because that was extreme!
All in all, we had a really nice day. Bibi Green even showed up so that was nice. We had loads of fun...I came away thousands of naira richer from all the spraying. What was not to enjoy....just had to brace myself for the wedding!
posted by Monef at 4:55 AM
2 Comments:
Im really horrified about the bound and gagged ocean bound thief. I have a fleeting feeling he was left...
I think the fishermen may have helped him out, there is really no way to be sure. That's the Nigerian justice system for you, vigilante to the core. Sad.
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